Taking my time

Things happened for a reason.
We go our separate way for a reason.
Allah maha Adil :)
Ida hamba Allah yang banyak buat dosa.
Dosa ngan mama papa family and even aiq.
Making faiq to go through things he went through when he was with me.
Ida tak nak seksa die lagi Ya Allah because i love him so much.
I can't lie to myself and my heart.
I do love him and that means i can't let him go through it again.
I love him and all i can  do is pray that he'll have a happy life with whom ever he choose to be with even though it might not be me :) i love him. Ida tak boleh selfish . Its okay i suffer with spm struggle through all these. What's  important is the person i love  faiq is back on his feet to his bright future :)
I know deep in my heart he'll be the men that was in my dream :)
Big car happy successful its okay if i have to be starbuck girl that he doesnt  recognise atleast i know he'll be the men i know he will be :) insyaAllah dengan izin Allah *Amin :)
All the person that i love the most
I'm taking this time to really ask for forgiveness
Im done praying for Allah to open his heart for me , crying in my sujud to give me a chance to make things right with him to love him right. Not for the mean time.
When Allah decide the time i want to make things right. Now i Learned my lesson well
Taking this nak betul kan balik kesilapan ida.
Posting bad things about my love ones in public Ya Allah dosa die mcm mount everest dah.
And he was right. Ida ni memang tak matang lagi selalu think negative on soo many things especially towards my love ones and family also. Sikap ida yang suke balas dendam towards my love one.Ya Allah ampun kan la dosa ida. Mcm mcm dah
Kalau Allah izin kat ida balik berbaik dengan faiq balik this time i want to make it right.
Ida tak nak buat dosa kat dia. I'd make things right :) love him right :)
But for the mean time im slowly learning from my mistake.
InsyaAllah dengan izin Allah ida boleh berubah :)
I can feel it in me already. A little improvement. Selama ni tak sedar ngan dosa ida. Now i know dosa ida kalau mati sekarang confirm masuk neraka tak payah soal dalam kubur :)
Mintak mintak things will be alright for me , and him. Never miss his name and his family in my prayers to have a happy life and murah kan rezeki mereka :) kalau Allah izin faiq and i will be together again. Allah know what he's doing :) kalau faiq bukan untuk ida pun Allah have a reason for it :)